Happy BIRTH-day Kaylee Elise

Kaylee Elise

November 25, 2011

9:48 am

8 lbs 8 oz

20.5 in

A baby is very precious and a gift from God.  This life starts from the moment of conception, not when you first hold the baby in your arms.  The love I felt for both of my girls started before they were born and before I ever heard their heart beat.  That first prenatal visit when they check the heart beat is so exciting and only added to my love!  It’s hard to believe there is a little life growing inside of you.

Kaylee’s birth was a joyous moment in our lives!  We will forever remember her grand entrance into the world.  Neva’s birth was somewhat traumatic for both Isaac and I.  Several very unfortunate and unnecessary things occurred that caused us to look into having a home birth for our next child.  We are sooooo glad we did!

With Neva I had an extensive cut/tear (to the 4th degree) and was told (actually yelled at) that I would never have a normal birth again and would have to have a c-section for any future babies. This was extremely disheartening to hear especially considering it was immediately after I gave birth to Neva. The episiotomy was not necessary and was only aggravated due to the CNM (certified nurse midwife) not allowing me to get into a better position or listen to my body.  At the beginning of my pushing stage she said that she saw me tearing and that she needed to perform an episiotomy.  We had requested this not be done in our birth plan, however, things did not go as planned.  She kept telling me to push harder and longer which did not allow my body the time it needed to stretch.  It seemed like she was trying to hurry things up.  In total, my pushing time with Neva lasted about twenty minutes due largely in part to the extensive cut/tear that occurred.  In contrast, with my home birth I was allowed the freedom to be in the position that felt most comfortable and to push as my body felt the urge.  This added to the length of my pushing stage which was about two hours total (my body started pushing on its own and I didn’t contribute until about an hour or so later when my body told me to), but was much better for my body and now recovery.  After Neva’s birth it took me a very long time to recover not only physically, but emotionally as well, from all that happened.  The doctors and the CNM who attended my labor and delivery were extremely rude.  

When I first arrived at the hospital in active labor (contractions lasting 60 seconds and 2 minutes apart) I was given a drug without any information on what it was really for and what it would do to me, my baby, or my labor.  The drug was given to prevent possible seizures due to high blood pressure.  I did not have high blood pressure, just what is normal for a woman in active labor without pain medication.  The drug confined me to the hospital bed and slowed down my labor greatly.  My labor lasted 18 hours with my contractions slowing down to ten minutes apart a few hours after being given the drug.  We were not told of these effects until after the fact and us asking them specifically if this drug slows labor down.  As mentioned above, I was not given the choice to push in the position I desired or as I felt necessary which ultimately led to my extensive cut/tear causing me to need to go to the OR to be stitched up.  I was yelled at by both the doctor taking me to the OR and the CNM, both blaming me for what happened and trying to place a guilt trip on me for choosing not to get an epidural and trying to have a natural birth with Neva.  Overall, I was treated very poorly by everyone except my nurses.  

I talked to several other doctors and midwives over the past two years who all were very encouraging and helped me through this.  They all said it is possible to have a natural birth and not tear at all or hardly at all with subsequent births.  The issue with my “high” blood pressure is that it is normal to have a slightly elevated blood pressure when laboring. Drugs are not necessary and it’s best to wait and let my body do its work as long as there are no other pre-eclampsia signs. I understand that every birth is different and am not opposed to doctors and hospitals. My desire is that thought would be given to the idea that God has made our bodies for having babies. Our bodies are capable of something miraculous! To question a woman’s ability to have a baby on her own is to diminish God’s power and design.  Many doctors have never witnessed a fully natural birth and are trained to be surgeons and fix problems. Midwives are trained to be with a woman during her whole labor and help her with ways to ease pain and various positions to get into that facilitate birth naturally. Many times doctors are hasty to "fix" something through drugs or other types of intervention. There are most definitely times when their services are needed and are greatly appreciated...especially in high risk pregnancies and emergencies that do occur! However, for a low risk pregnancy it's best to let the mom listen to her body and not step in unless absolutely necessary.

Getting the tub set up in advance.  

For the past few months we have been going to see a licensed midwife for all my prenatal visits.  She is very knowledgeable and has showed us much care and respect.  Her support has meant so much to Isaac and I and we knew that we had made the right choice to have a water birth at home.  Thanksgiving I had irregular contractions all day long and wasn’t sure if labor was about to begin or what exactly was happening.  I called my midwife to let her know, but knew there was nothing to do but wait.  That night I had trouble sleeping.  I got up almost every hour and by 3:30 am was getting tired of waking up.  At around 5 am I started getting stronger contractions and decided to time them.  They were ten minutes apart and weren’t slowing down, only getting stronger in intensity.  I got up for a bit and they sped up to two to three minutes apart.  I woke Isaac up to tell him I that I thought I was in labor.  His response: “Yes!” with a smile.  It makes me smile now, although at the time I did not feel like smiling with him.  ;)  By 6 am I was pretty sure this was the real thing and had him call our midwife to let her know.  He started filling up the tub and preparing the bed while I managed my contractions which were getting stronger and stronger.

When Isaac said the tub was ready I jumped right in...not literally of course.  ;)  Oh, the joy!  The warm water really took the edge off and I could get in whatever position felt the best. Even at this time I wanted to give up which I knew was a normal response, but understood I needed to keep my mind in order if I was going to make it through.  I kept telling myself to just relax and breathe through my contractions.  My contractions were coming fast and strong with not much time to breathe in between.  Isaac was a strong support and gave me a sip of juice and water after every contraction...oh and a kiss too when I needed it.  He kept telling me how strong I was and that I could do this.  He helped me so much and reminded me that labor doesn’t last forever and pretty soon I will be holding my precious baby in my arms.  All of a sudden during the next contraction I felt my body involuntarily pushing.  I told Isaac and knew that it wouldn’t be too much longer.  Isaac called our midwife to let her know and she told him she was on her way along with another midwife friend to help out with the birth.  When she arrived she quietly slipped into the room and I kept doing what I was doing.  She checked the baby’s heart beat to make sure all was well and just let me do my thing.  It was nice to have the freedom to move how I needed.  At that point, I started pushing with the contractions just slightly. My midwife encouraged me just to give little nudges allowing the baby to help stretch me out rather than tear again.  Both midwives were a great support and told me I was doing so well and to just listen to my body.

Pretty soon out popped a little head.  I reached down to feel and knew it was only a short time till I held this little one in my arms.  I felt so happy and knew I could do it.  The next contraction came and I began to push.  The baby had its hand up by its head and the cord had decided to wrap around both the hand and head so my midwife along with her friend helped hold the cord from wrapping any tighter and coached me to slow my pushing and then at the right moment when to push harder to let the baby come all the way out.  Because the cord had been compressed during some of the pushing they gave the baby a couple puffs of air to help her along.  At this point I still didn’t know if she was a boy or girl.  Isaac saw as she was coming out, but didn’t say anything yet.  I was just so happy to be holding my precious baby and it all felt so right and so safe.  It was such a beautiful moment as I held her and she even looked up and watched her daddy for a little bit.

After all was said and done, I ended up only having a 1st degree tear with NO STITCHES!  Yay!  I am healing very well and have been able to take care of my little girl like a mom should.  With Neva, I couldn’t even stand and wouldn’t dare walk with her in my arms till the 3rd or 4th week after delivery.  It was such a dramatically different experience to have Kaylee at home! I loved it and would do it again!  In fact, I can’t imagine having a birth not at home and without a water tub now.  It made so much difference, plus having the support of my midwife was essential!  I knew I was in good hands and she would take care of both me and my baby.  :)  Being in my own environment helped me to relax and feel safe.  My labor lasted just under 5 hours before I was holding my beautiful baby girl.

Kaylee is doing wonderfully!  I am enjoying having a newborn to cuddle and love.  It’s so much fun to see how her big sis adores her and likes to comfort her when she cries...and even when she is just asleep.  ;)  Neva will rub Kaylee’s cheek and head very gently and tell her, “Don’ cry.  Don’ cry. It’s okay.”  I’m so glad Neva is adapting well to having a little baby around.  She is a great big sis!

The happy growing family.

Sisterly love.

A kiss from the big sis. :)

Pumpkin Patch

We had a good time with friends at a pumpkin patch!  Neva loved running around and playing in the corn "sand" box.  She also thoroughly enjoyed the slides!  It was quite the challenge to get her to stop and smile...not to mention just slow down.  :)  She is becoming quite the active toddler!  And she LOVES talking and singing!  I'm even starting to understand her more.  ;)  "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star" is her favorite to sing.

Now the fun begins.

Neva loved looking at the animals!

She is telling me to "Sit.  Sit."

Some new friends we've made recently.  They have a ton of fun together!

I absolutely LOVE my little girl!

Big Girl Bed

The past two days/nights Neva has been sleeping in her big girl bed.  It was a big transition for mommy!...uh hem,  I mean Neva.  The first nap there was some crying and not wanting to stay in bed, but it was quickly resolved.  That night was a bigger challenge with many tears shed.  I was not the one shedding tears, but was getting close to it.  Neva did not want to stay in bed and was just throwing a fit.  Daddy finally was able to get her to stay in bed and sleep.  When I checked on her later she was hiccuping in her sleep.  :(  I felt awful, but knew she needed to transition to a big girl bed before this next baby comes.  The next night was MUCH better!  And today for naptime, she went right into her room, crawled up onto the bed, went right to sleep just like normal.  Phew!  That makes mommy happy.  :)

Neva has also been doing very well with potty training.  There are still the occasional accidents, but she is starting to tell me BEFORE she goes.  Yay!  I never thought about potty training as such a big deal until I am the parent.  It's really quite exciting when we have success in making it to the potty!  Notice I said "we."  It takes a team effort.  Neva will get caught up in whatever she is doing and forget to tell me unless I ask her every so often if she needs to go potty.  It's so cute to see her nod her head and say, "yesh."

The Barn Apartment

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Growing Up

My baby is not a baby any longer.  She is a sprout that just keeps growing.  I love being her mom and watching her learn.  I feel so privileged that God has given me this opportunity and don't take lightly the responsibility.  Little humans are such sponges and I can see it even more clearly every day!

An exciting development is my munchkin's interest in using her potty.  (She is about 20 months.)  The other day she took her diaper off and used her potty all by herself!  I was sooooooo excited, and her face when she saw my excitement was priceless.  She got excited too and started clapping and gave me a hug. :)  Today she did not want to wear a diaper this morning, but her big girl underwear.  We had several small accidents, but we are making progress.

I have been teaching her to say, "please read," when she wants a book read to her.  It makes me smile to see her walk up to me with a book or two and ask me to "please read."  :)

She has learned two new words the past few days.  The first word is "exercise." We were in the pool and I was swimming some laps.  I explained to her that I was exercising.  The next thing I knew she said "ehs-size."  It actually came out pretty clear and it has become her new favorite word...that and the phrase, "Don't touch."  Lol. :D  I was using the laptop and told my little girl not to touch.  She then proceeds to point to the laptop and say, "Do-n tush." Now she walks around with her babies saying, "do-n tush."  Silly girl!

A verse that I am memorizing and is my prayer not only for my own heart, but for my little girl's is  Deuteronomy 5:29.  "O that there were such a heart in them, that they would fear me, and keep all my commandments always, that it might be well with them, and with their children for ever!"  The first thing to keeping God's commandments is to first know what they are.  Something that God has been working on in my heart is that I am in His Word and learning more about Him.  How can I teach Neva God's ways if I don't know them or am following them myself.  A big one is my attitude.  I can see bad attitudes in others so easily, but when it comes to me, do I have the attitude that is pleasing to God?  I tell my munchkin when she starts pouting after not getting her way to have a good attitude.  But do I have a good attitude when I don't get my way?  Hmm...

How to Make a Jean Skirt

I have had so much fun making jean skirts!  My mom is the one who introduced me to the possibility of converting jeans into a cute skirt.  She made me my first jean skirt when I wore the knees out of my favorite pair of jeans while in junior high.  To remedy the "hole-y" jeans we cut them off just above the holes in the knees and it made the most comfortable and perfect jean skirt ever!  I wish I still fit into it!...and that I hadn't worn two holes in the back pocket area either!  Although to fix that you can use some spare denim and cut out and sew on an extra pocket to cover the hole.  It's actually quite cute! :)  I have made several skirts on my own now and used regular denim jeans, khakis, and corduroy.  They've all turned out great!  The only caution is when using jeans with stretchy denim...they don't turn out as well and kind of hug the bum area.

Step 1:  Rip out the inseam using a seam ripper.  On the front, rip to within one or two inches of the zipper.  On the back, rip to about the bottom of the pockets.  These are just estimates and can be adjusted accordingly. This part is the most boring part, so I watch “I Love Lucy” or something to help pass the time in a more profitable manner.  :D

Step 2:  Try on the “open” pair of jeans to find the length desired.  Mark with a pin.  Keep in mind a hem length of a half inch or so.

Step 3:  Measure from the bottom of the jeans to the pin mark to make sure you will have enough denim to fit in the middle section of the skirt.  If making a longer skirt, you will need to have another piece of material to fit in the center.  This could be from another pair of jeans or a piece of cotton fabric.

Step 4:  Cut the jeans at the pin mark.  Be careful to cut straight across the leg.  If it isn’t cut straight the skirt might bell, being shorter at the sides and longer in the middle.  This can be corrected, but not usually without making the skirt shorter.

Step 5: Use the bottom sections of the cut off jeans to fill in the middle (front and back) for the skirt.  This will take some time playing with it to get it to fit just right and be smooth.  Pin and try on to see if the middle piece is fitted in right.  I normally have to re-pin and try on several times to get it to work right.  How it looks on you when it is pinned is fairly close to how it will look once sewn, so make sure it fits smoothly with no bells or wrinkles.

Step 6:  Sew!  :0)  On denim skirts I will mimic the jean look with the gold thread and two lines.  On my brown corduroy skirt I used brown thread and only one sewn line.  I do not sew the bottom of the skirt yet. At this point, the middle section is a little longer and hanging out at the bottom. To make handling the skirt easier as you sew, you can trim some of the extra material off of the inserts.  Be careful not to cut into the skirt or cut too close to where you will sew.

Step 7:  Cut the extra material off from the inside of the skirt and some from the bottom.  Once you finish step 8, then completely even out the bottom.

Step 8:  On denim skirts I will sew a line around the raw edge of the bottom of the skirt about 1/4-1/2” from the bottom.  This will prevent the skirt from fraying too far up.  On the brown corduroy skirt I sewed a small hem instead of leaving a raw edge.  It just depends on what you like and what material you are making the skirt out of.  Some jeans will be hard to hem because the hem will become too thick.

Step 9:  Wash and dry the skirt (in the dryer).

Step 10:  The raw edge should have some fray now and you can wear as is or cut long threads to even out.  :0)

"Ta da"

My prego skirt.  :)

"No, no!"

My little munchkin makes me laugh! Here is a story I just had to share.  The other day I was washing dishes and she came up behind me and threw her baby doll and cup that she was holding.  I was about to reprimand her when I realized she didn't throw her baby and the cup, the baby threw the cup.  She ran over to the baby and bent down saying, "No, no! No, no!" along with the hand sign for "no".  Then she promptly picked the baby up and helped the baby pick up the cup.  :D  She is a good little mommy to her baby.  It also was a good reminder to me that she is watching...everything!

"Raising Godly Tomatoes"

I love my little girl and am excited about the baby on the way!  My desire is to raise my family with a heart for God and to ultimately see them come to know Jesus as their personal Saviour.  I don't just want my precious girl to outwardly do the right thing when her heart is rebelling.  Eventually that rebellion will manifest itself outward.  My prayer is for her to have a right attitude when she obeys, as well as that she would obey. A friend recently recommended a book to me that caught my attention right away.  The book:  "Raising Godly Tomatoes" by L. Elizabeth Krueger (www.RaisingGodlyTomatoes.com).  I am only part way through this book, but am so appreciative of the time and energy she spent in writing it because it has helped my husband and I already in teaching our little girl to obey...the first time with a good attitude.  I am excited to have some practical direction in raising my family that is all Biblically based.  She has included Scripture for every point she makes and really brings to life these principles.  I highly recommend this book for the Biblical principles she presents and the practical application in raising kids.  It's not an easy task to raise a family.  My husband and I have barely begun, but are excited about our journey.

My Jar of Buttons

This is my first blog and I have a lot to learn on how to make it my own!  I've seen so many wonderful blogs about crafting, cooking, and just life that have inspired me to start my own.  I want to share the hodgepodge of things that make up my life, thus the title "Jen's Jar of Buttons".  Have you ever seen a button jar that contained all the same buttons in color, size, and shape?  One of the best things about a button jar is you'll never know what you'll find.  That's the fun part - dumping them all out and searching through them!  =)